just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
