He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
