took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
