biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
