Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
