I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
