At least make sure they are 18
Why
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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