we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
