Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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