I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
