I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
