Just mADE A PArabola og urine
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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