What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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