the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
she looked like the before picture.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize
