32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
