i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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