drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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