: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
