bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
