Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
