bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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