I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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