her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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