My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize