this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
