Betty ford says i'm here all night
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
