The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
