I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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