i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
