"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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