I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
