watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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