Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Terrible idea I love it
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
