it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Terrible idea I love it
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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