Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
