It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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