I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
