i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
