I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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