You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
