Soap is not a condiment
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
