ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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