Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Randomize