He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
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