I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
