He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
