somebody snuck up and got me drunk
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
