im gay
i know
yea but for you.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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