no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Randomize
