So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
